Well Diva’s (and Don’s if your bold enough to purchase) there is an actual machine called the KegelMaster 2000 to tighten up those loosy goosy walls. This newly crafted machine has different strengths and setting from 1-15. Can you believe that?! By the time you reach the 15 setting you will now be able to squeeze up to 8 pounds. Unbelievable!!!

You will now become the p*ssy squeezing pro and every man you encounter will gossip about the tightest p*ssy they ever had by “YOU”!

Now there is reps and all, not just a simple insertion and a squeeze. I’m sure you have heard of the saying “practice makes perfect”. You simply insert up to 3 inches (make sure you are lubricated) and my Diva’s please remember that this is not a DILDO… so do not freak off with the machine! After insertion you may feel an uncomfortable feeling.  OH! Pleasssseee I’m sure you’ve had BIGGER. Well it’s just your muscle contracting against the Kegelmaster and that my Diva’s is the beginning of the exercise.

Diva’s will you try this out? I say “why not?”. The Kegelmaster can be purchased online for the low price of $89.95 at www.Kegelmaster2000.com

Accountant:  While just about any position will require some amount of face-time with co-workers and clients, accountants find themselves diving into a spreadsheet more often than reaching for a cell phone. With plenty of financial data and tax information to digest, chit-chat time is at a minimum.

Good News: The U.S Department of Labor predicts a 22 percent increase in job opportunities for accountants and auditors through 2018.

Average Salary for Accountants/Auditors: $68,960*

*****

Computer Programmer:  It’s not uncommon to see computer programmers listening to music while coding. Telecommuting is also an option at some companies. If you can write the code (which isn’t easy) many tech managers might be happy to leave you alone.

Good News: Job opportunities are expected to soar 22 percent for computer programmers and software engineers through 2018, according to the Department of Labor.

Average Salary for Computer Programmers: $74,690*

*****

Writer:  Writing is a solitary process. The ability to block out distractions and stay focused is essential in this career. Marketing is one industry where writers and copywriters are in demand.

Good News: The Department of Labor expects salaried writing positions to increase as the economy strengthens. Online media outlets are driving many of these writing opportunities.

Average Salary for Writers/Authors: $65,960*

*****

Forensic Science Technician:  Although crime scene investigators have to deal with people, it’s often just dealing with their hair, tissue, or DNA samples. When not collecting evidence, working in a laboratory setting is most common for forensic scientists.

Good News: Jobs for forensic science technicians are expected to grow 20 percent through 2018, according to the Department of Labor.

Average Pay for Forensic Science Technicians: $55,040*

*****

Budget Analyst:  Similar to accountants, budget analysts help organizations increase profits by improving efficiency. But the bulk of their time is often spent working independently while compiling and crunching numbers.

Good News: Thanks largely to consulting opportunities, budget analysts are projected to enjoy a 15 percent increase in jobs through 2018, according to the Department of Labor.

Average Salary for Budget Analysts: $70,660*

*****

Medical Transcriptionist:  Petty office politics and gossip don’t easily reach the ears of medical transcriptionists, who wear headphones while transcribing dictated recordings from doctors and other health care pros. A no-nonsense, buttoned-up approach can help since you’ll be editing reports for grammar and clarity. Many MT’s work at home or off-site from their clients.

Good News: Independent contractors are common in this career, with many working from home.

Average Pay for Medical Transcriptionists: $33,530*

Actuary: Risk assessment is the name of the game for actuaries, who spend their days analyzing the habits of people and companies. Instead of talking with people, though, their work is based on statistics.

Good News: Employment of actuaries is expected to jump 21 percent through 2018, according to the U.S. Department of Labor.

Average Salary for Actuaries: $98,620*

On a side note: Many women that we think are bitches have serious mental illnesses that are not being addressed which could range from something as mild as seasonal depression to something a major as bipolar disorder or split personalities. If you have a friend or family member or maybe it is yourself, whom is constantly “acting crazy”, starting shit, extremely moody and that you may even want to knock the hell out sometimes, you may suggest they seek some mental health treatment.

A stripper from Baltimore paid $1,000 for the underground silicone injections. She heard through the grapevine from other strippers of Smedley, who provided silicone injections to clients so they could have a big ol azz.

The stripper met with Kim Smedley at a Baltimore Renaissance hotel to receive nine silicone injections in her hips and azz. Smedley reassured the stripper that the silicone was for medical use. Stripper girl laid on the bed while Smedley poured the silicone from a water jug into a cup and then from the cup she then used a needle and syringe to suck the silicone in. From there, Smedley injected it into the strippers azz.

Smedley is not a license medical professional, and also did you know silicone is not approved by the FDA to inject into your azz. Smedley’s finances have been investigated and police discovered that she did not have any purchases for silicone, but for purchases at Lowe’s and Home Depot, where it is believed she bought the unknown substanced for the injections.

The stripper, after receiving her final treatment, reported shortness of breath and was admitted to Johns Hopkins Hospital and diagnosed with pneumonia and had fluid in her lungs. She then had to be admitted to Good Samaritan Hospital where she admitted to the doctors that she had received  silicone injections. A CAT scan discovered that silicone fluid was on both sides of her lungs.

The stripper still has silicone fluids in her lungs, after a ten day stay at the hospital and sent a text message to Smedley saying “You Almost Killed Me” but received no reply from Smedley.

Ladies this is a warning!!! If you are desperate for a big ol azz, try wearing “Booty Pops” (butt padding) or getting the medical treatment called “Brazilian Butt Lift” and spare your life. It’s not worth it.

But only 38 percent of women say they have actually slept with a date any sooner because of digital intimacy, according to the 1,200 women and men who participated in the third annual sex survey by Shape and Men’s Fitness magazines.

Smart phones and laptops are the new toys that lead to the bedroom, it said, with nearly 80 percent of women and 58 percent of men saying social media tools leads to sex faster.

Texting is the No. 1 way lovers stay in touch, the survey found, with men texting 39 percent more often than phoning and women 150 percent more.

Even before the magic begins, 70 percent of women and 63 percent of men use Google and other online tools to screen potential dates.

Sixty-five percent of those polled said they had been asked out by text and 49 percent through a Facebook message.

Once the relationship clicks, 72 percent of women report scouring a current partner’s ex-girlfriends’ Facebook pages.

Even in the heat of passion, some people just can’t get enough of their digital devices, the survey found. When a call or text comes in during sex, 5 percent of respondents said they glance to see who is calling and 1 percent say they stop to answer the phone.

And when the spark is extinguished, digital dumping is the new way to break up, with 43 percent of women and 27 percent of men reporting getting a text along the lines of “It’s not you, it’s me.”

For the heartbroken, the Internet keeps hope alive, with 81 percent of all respondents saying they won’t de-friend an ex on Facebook and 75 percent admitting to constantly checking a former sweetheart’s page.

(Reporting by Barbara Goldberg; Editing by Jerry Norton)

• It’s supposed to boost your immune system and cardio health
• It may prevent depression/stress, lower blood pressure, relieve pain and even fight aging.

Okay so what if you have tried it and hate the taste or need to overcome the gag reflex? Not to worry these are only minor obstacles. I have some tips to make sure you finish up as the Brainiac that I know you are capable of being.  To tackle the taste feed your man, sponsor, whoever fruit especially pineapples because it makes the cheeme taste sweeter. Second, pop a mint, altoid, tic tac, Listerine strip, menthol cough drop (you get the picture) in your mouth. The mint will kill the taste and cause a little tingle before the sprinkle.  Third, avoid the taste buds and deep throat the jimmy. Then grab his balls and squeeze it out (gently of course). If you really want to put on a show open your mouth and show him what he gave you. Smile like you’re on candid camera, swallow it and then show him your empty mouth, hey stick the tongue out if you want too.  And with that last Kudegra you will be the best protein guzzler there is even if you’re faking it.

by J.Starr

I love this topic because, well my job is to write about what people don’t openly talk about. I have stated before that sometimes it is best to lie about the number of sexual partners that you have had in order to salvage another’s ego, and /or your own reputation. I stand by that statement, however, I have a few amendments to my own rule.

As discussed previuosly there are several reasons to lie; now lets talk about the reasons to tell the truth:

LIES SUCK

There is something about a lie that never goes away or that never quite sits right with people. We have all been caught in our own lies, and it is not a pretty picture. The more you lie, the more you have to lie to cover the original lie. One slip of tongue and your story can be exposed… Who wants that? So if you are in a situation where you want to be honest then you should be honest ( or as close to honest as possible). This means you will get as close to the actual truth as possibe.

ATTEMPT THE TRUTH

Let’s say the topic arises between you and a person you are dating regarding the number of guys you have had sex with. How you feel about him and the relationship would determine the validity of your response. For example, if you care enough about this person to be honest-ish for the sake of your own conscience and for the sake of not being caught in your lies,  then you should be truthful (sorta).

If this is just a person you are dealing with then randomly just pick a # that you think he will be ok with. He/ She is unworthy of such classified information at this time. If they transition to a serious relationship then revisit the topic at a later date.

GUYS OK… GIRLS NOT OK

I’ve come to realization that no dude on this earth wants to think his girl was, is or ever will be a hoe. Reality is , there is a thing called the past . Unfortunately you can’t change that. You can only control the present and make goals for the future. That being said, it is more important what and who you are currently “doing” as opposed to who you did and when. Disclaimer: If you slept with someone’s relative or best friend you can pretty much cancel that.) So while it is never advisible to be running the streets crazy, screwing anything with legs, remember that there will always be consequences for your actions. You might one day have to talk about it. You may even feel bad about it and wish you can go back and erase a few off that list. But it won’t happen. Sorry! My friend just got married to a man who she knows had sex with like a gazillion women. I asked her if she was bothered, she actually said no, because out of the gazillion, the one he chose to settle down with is me. I smiled, because on the other side of town my homegirl was stresed about her dude asking her number. She wanted to be honest, but knew the truth ( a # over 50) would scare the “ish” out of him . This goes to show that for guys- a lot is ok , and for girls, ummm not so much. (technically)

So, my advise is… as with everything, play your cards right. Know who you are dealing with. Honesty is a privilege. If it comes back to haunt you and someone holds certain things against you, oh well it wasn’t meant to be in the first place. No one comes in a relationship with a clean slate. It is all about accepting what you chose to accept and what you can’t deal with you need to leave at the front door.

A man once told me “No matter what she has done , no chick better ever tell me she f*cked no more than 4 guys.” Really? I silentely prayed for this man as I knew that he would rather the lies. I wondered why he thought 4 was the magic number. And that lead me to think what is the actual magic number. I mean I know some fat busted chicks who have had their fair share, so to me that was just a strange choice in numbers. Besides everyone knows “Magic Numbers” are always odd numbers. Wink.

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This is the true story of Erica and Joey two successful professional African Americans living in Washington, DC

*Erica ( 26) dated * Joey (29) for about 2 months before they even had sex. (An accomplishment for both of them).  They went out to dinner, the movies, spent weekends together, and spoke about everything, well almost everything.  Finally after 8 long weeks, on her birthday, she decided the time was right and decided to consummate their dating.

For the next couple of weeks they enjoyed long nights of eating, drinking, and off the hook sex.  One particular time the condom broke. Another time, it “fell off”. Shortly after she noticed a pattern started to develop, but she didn’t confront him about it. It seemed like every time they had sex, he would either refuse to wear a condom, or the condom would mysteriously “fall off.”  Falling deeper and deeper for this man, Erica decided she would have a talk with one of her girlfriends and come up with a way to confront Joey about it. He seemed like a cool dude, and he just got out of a long term relationship so she wasn’t the least bit concerned about disease, plus he was a professional hard working man. If anything she feared she might get pregnant since birth control is only 99% effective.

You better get it together girl, that shit is not cute, or safe.  You don’t know what he has and you need to tell him he better use a condom or no coochie for him.  Her worried friends tried to school her, but still she felt that if she confronted him about the situation, he would think she didn’t trust him.  So she ignored the situation.

2 more months elapsed and Erica had not had the talk with Joey.  As far as Erica was concerned they were in a committed relationship and there was no need to discuss STDs.  She was only sleeping with him.  The next week in the middle of a phone conversation, Erica casually mentioned to Joey that she is glad that they are finally a couple.  Joey seemed shocked by this comment, “Nah, we are just kicking it,”he said.  ”Erica, I told you months ago I wasn’t ready for a relationship, yeah we have fun together but I don’t consider us a couple, I thought we were just friends.” “Joey, are you serious, we’ve been fucking each other for months, raw at that, are you saying you are with other chicks?”  Joey was unphased by her outrage. In fact he saw nothing wrong with having unprotected sex with Erica and countless others.  Erica’s naivety and displaced trust in this “stranger” led her to believe, that he was only having sex with her, when in fact he was sexing several other women without protection.

7 months later, Erica gave birth to a beautiful baby girl.  4 months prior Erica was diagnosed as being HIV positive. Fortunately the baby did not inherit the disease.  Unfortunately Erica has to deal with being a single Mother/ African American HIV positive woman.  All of her dreams may not be realized. And her life will be unnecessarily cut short.

She was too afraid to ask Joey if he had been tested.  She assumed that because of his nice, kind, and innocent demeanor and since he had mentioned that he had gotten out of a long-term relationship he was “safe.”  She didn’t want to hurt his feelings. She ignored common sense, and the advice or her friends. All because out of all the time they spent together talking, they never had THIS TALK.

The moral of this story is use common sense. Always use condoms. Don’t assume anything.  A formal conversation regarding when your last tests were taken, and what the status of your relationship is is imperative.  You must get tested for STDs and HIV. Next time, before you think about having unprotected sex with someone you might want to ask …rather, insist that you have “The Talk.”

The rate of African American women getting infected with HIV has increased by 25% over the last 5 years.  We are becoming the largest infected group in the U.S. to contract the deadly virus.  AIDS is real. There is nothing, nobody, or no feeling worth dying for.

Fellas- let’s make this real simple for you, we all lie about how many men we have slept with.

You’ll probably never know the real number of sexual partners your woman has had.  You want the truth, but face it, you can’t handle the truth! We know this, therefore when asked the dreaded “How many?” We know to lie, lie & lie some more.

If we say 5 …we meant 20.  If we say 2 we meant 8, and if we say you’re our first…that just means we can’t remember any of their names.

Not to blow up spots but the general rule of thumb is- take the number she admits to and double it, and that gives you about half of the real number … maybe.

Why would women feel the need to lie about their sex lives?

Well…

• If we tell the truth you might think we are a hoe and HELLO! We all know the old adage  - “You can’t turn a hoe into a housewife” (not to say we want to be a house wife, or any other kind of wife anyway but still)
• You thought we were so sweet and innocent, we don’t want to burst your bubble.
• Maybe I’m a tad bit ashamed- I lost count after 22 years old and 30 men (Yeah it was back in college, in the back of the car, or back in the day, but just maybe I would rather forget that shit even happened)

• If you knew the real number you’d know I was lying when I said you were the “best”, the “biggest”, the “only one I let put his dick in mouth”, etc. etc.
• Honesty might be the best policy but sometimes the truth hurts. We are trying to protect your ego.

Most men say they want a woman with some experience, but they don’t want to feel like she’s got more miles on her then his SUV.  This is probably the main reason we women lie.

Women often try to justify their distortions. Some women use very complicated personal rules, like, ‘It doesn’t count because I only had sex with him once, I don’t really remember that guy that well, so he’s off the list. ‘I was drunk, so he doesn’t count,’ and the list goes on… we had a long enough list to take up 8 pages …Here are our favorites.

Reasons not to count a sexual partner, and other legal rules and clauses (some might actually hold up in a court of law)

1. The sex was trash

2. It was only anal or only oral (what exactly classifies as “sex” anyway?)

3.  It was a one night stand

4.  Your mother had a baby by him

5.  You don’t know his name (first, last, or nick)

6.  It was a quickie ( 10 minute rule in effect- anything less doesn’t count)

7. It happened on a ski trip, Vegas, All Star Weekend or Spring break ( what happens there stays there, you’re not supposed to remember anything)

8.  You were drinking, drunk, smoking, or taking “something”

9. You subtract one fuck buddy by default every 4 years

10. Your number of sexual partners is more than double your age

11. You don’t remember

12. He’s not a known actor, celebrity, or even remotely “cool”

13. He is a she- licking coochie is not intercourse

14. The dude was someone no one knows and no one can ever find out

15. He’s dead

16. Anyone besides your husband after you are married

17. If you fucked more then one person in 24 hours or less it counts as an incident; there is no need for you to count each individual

18. If you moved out of state – clean slate!

19. I didn’t come!

20. If you become a born again virgin- your past sexual relations can be deleted from your memory (I usually become born again every 6 months or so.)

21. He only put the head in

22. He didn’t come in me ( mouths and anus don’t count as “in”)

23. Did I mention I DIDN’T FUCKING COME!

24. He wore a condom so there was really no contact

25. The dick was little – almost like it never even went in.

26. Slept with?  We didn’t sleep at all

27. The record label shelved his second album as if   I’d dare admit to fucking his  non label having ass

28. Anyone done before the age of 21- you didn’t know what you were doing

29. The lights were off, so technically you have no confirmation if anything actually happened or not.

30. You slipped and fell on it.